IX. Don’t Stress?

Dan didn’t have to wait long for “his lawyer” to arrive. Just enough time to select a table in the busy coffeehouse, arrange two glasses of water and wonder whether Kelly still talked fast when she was excited.

It was the greeting of two good friends who hadn’t seen each other in years. ‘You look great!’ ‘Look at you!’ ‘So nice to see you.’ ‘How are the kids?’ ‘Senior Counsel – good on you!’

Two coffees were ordered in the midst of it.

Dan took the initiative early. ‘Really appreciate your help, Kelly. I’m embarrassed to say that I tell people you’re my lawyer never expecting to engage you as a lawyer.’

He handed her the court letter as she responded. ‘It’s a joy to be called your lawyer. A privilege to be your friend. If only you’d been my fashion consultant, I’d have gone so much further.’

Kelly had charm to burn.

‘Oh’, she smiled as she worked through the document.

Then she began. Or more accurately, accelerated strongly from a standing start.

‘Firstly, don’t stress. Secondly, really don’t stress. That name’s been around. Financial loss?’

Dan nodded.

‘They’ll settle out of court. That’s all they want to do. Don’t stress. Last case of theirs had something to do with pet mice in a server room. Don’t know why the mice were in there – were they powering it like a hamster wheel!? Should have used hamsters instead, I guess. Anyway, don’t stress. The court is just as likely to throw it out, and they’ll want to settle. Any reasonable person would want to settle, and they’re just reasonable enough. Oh, and they’re not suing you. You didn’t think they were suing you, did you?’

Dan looked a little sheepish.

‘No, they’re not suing you! The letter would look different, probably be served in person. Don’t stress. You’re a witness. Not the defendant. Legal advice is just standard, and who wouldn’t seek it anyway. They’ll settle. First thing I heard they did was about the wrong drug being dispensed by a pharmacist. An actual serious thing. Long time in hospital. Not good. Full recovery though I think. Since then, it’s just been about the money. Poor people. I think they see it as their vocation now. Unlucky you came across them. You probably help people. They probably knew. You probably suspected something was off.’

Dan nodded, wondering how Kelly could inhale and talk at the same time. Not lacking for oxygen his friend continued her stream of consciousness.

‘Yeah, it’s not right. Don’t stress. Only stress if the defendant is easily offended or has a big ego. No, scratch that. Don’t stress. If you do need any advice, call me. Call me straight away. Don’t stress. You probably won’t hear until a day or so before. And if the mail is slow, they’ll text you on the morning. You won’t have to go. Don’t stress.’

Dan was beginning to think he didn’t need to stress about the legal action.

Eventually, Kelly slowed down and began to talk about her career and family. Dan’s turn came in due time, and they parted in the same glowing mood in which they’d met.

Though, what was that thing about the big ego?

Dan was about to have this question answered and experience the defendant’s offence first-hand.

Time for a showdown.